A new year right around the corner...

2006 is about to come to a close. A This year had been full of good things and full of bad things. However, compared to 2003 and 2004 this year has been a cake walk (sort of). I quit my long time job at Paraben. The whole overworked and underpaid blah blah blah scenario. Probably the smartest choice I've made all year. 2006 wasn't without it's speed bumps however. If you don't know what those were then that's just too bad.

I got a Nintendo Wii and the new Zelda for Christmas and it rules. The Playstation 3 and Xbox 360 can tag-team lick my balls because the Wii kicks that much ass.

Angela should be getting out here soon hopefully so that will be a very nice and much needed event to happen.

Anyways... quick and point.

-mbh signing off...

I came, I saw, I partied...

The Chistmas party was a huge success! It was a lot of fun to dress up in a tuxedo and spend some time with the people I work with in a non-work environment. It was special to see everyone decked out in tuxedos and dresses. I wished Angela could have been there so badly! She would have loved it. Plus I really want her to meet the people I work with and have them meet her. I didn't win any of the killer prizes though so that made me sad. However, just like I promised I took numerous pictures for her. Next year she will be there for sure. I miss you Angela!

-mbh signing off...

If I'm not crazier...

cra·zy /kre-zi/[krey-zee]
adjective, -zi·er, -zi·est, noun, plural -zies.

1. mentally deranged; demented; insane.
2. senseless; impractical; totally unsound.

Sometimes I feel like I'm losing my mind. My fragile little mind! Can someone please stop this roller coaster I need to puke!

This week started out really bad and it seems that it will end well. I'm feeling massive amounts better. I'm eating again and I'm all caught up at work. Tonight is the big Christmas bash over at the Grand America and I'm all ready to go. Got my tuxedo ready, shoes polished and a haircut. The only thing that is missing is Angela. I would give anything to have her there with me. So I'm going to be alone. Well, there will be around 300 other people there but without Angela I'll still be "alone". I'm mainly going because I love to get dressed up and they are giving away some sweet prizes. Oh and I have to keep up appearances since I'm still the new guy on the team. All in all the night should be a pleasant one. I promised Angela to take a ton of pictures and to post them on Myspace. So when I get home I'll download the pictures and/or video(s).
Well, I have over 500 computers waiting for agents to be deployed on (ugh) so I have to go.

-mbh signing off...

If you aren't a little crazier,
then you aren't normal...
-mbh

Another day at the office...

For the love of all that is Monday. Yes it is Monday. I'm down in the superlab pretending to work ;) Really, I'm just taking a small break. Since I didn't write a whole lot yesterday I figured that I owed it to myself to write something more today. I'm feeling much better today. Just needed one more day for me to "push through". It was only a matter of time.

Numbness. In all honesty I wish I could flip a switch in my head and just be numb to everything. Totally emotionless. A robot. Starting to get stressed and anxious? Simple. (Flick!) Ahhh, now I can enjoy my caramel frappe and just sit here and stare blankly at the monitor and listen to Gary Numan. Too bad life wasn't meant to be lived numbly. (Damnit).

-mbh signing off...

Everyday I die...

What a crappy day today has been. I can't believe it's ONLY five in the evening. It's been a long last seven days. An eternity. I figured the weekend would be the start of the beginning to feel better. So I was wrong... In about 14 hours I have to go to work. Someone put a bullet in my brain. Someone please sock me in the jaw as hard as you can. Unconciousness would be a relief at this point. My room is a mess, I am a mess! I was staring at myself in the mirror today. I seriously look like I've been drug under a car for 20 miles. I've seen me look this way before, almost three years ago. I tell myself to suck it up and stop being a wuss. My skin burns and my eyes feel like two hard-boiled eggs sunk in their sockets. God I'm pathetic.
I went for a drive which was calming of sorts. I drove out to West Mountain like I used to so many years ago. Nothing has changed out there. I took the long way there around the south side of the lake. It was cold outside but the cool air felt good on my burning flesh. I'm so sick of this.
I don't really feel like writing.

-mbh signing off...

The world turns around...

No matter what the world will turn and time will keep marching forward. (Damnit). It seems that I must constantly remind myself that even though I feel like shit sometimes and am metally anguished that eventually I won't be. Whoever said "Life is hard"? I would like very much to kick him in the balls. That goes for the person that said "life isn't fair" too.

It's after 3:00am! It's Angela's birthday today! Woot. Happy Happy Birthday, Happy Happy Birthday! I love you honey!

I came home from a LOOOONG week of working and other stresses and crashed out around 7:00pm. I was half asleep on the drive home from Salt Lake. I was only planning on closing my eyes for an hour or so. I hadn't eating anything all day so my stomach wanted an upheaval when I fell asleep. I kept waking up thinking I should get out of bed and go do something but that wasn't happening. When I awoke at almost 3 I REALLY felt like I was going to puke. So what do you do when you feel like you are going to puke? You go get a carne asada quesadilla from Betos! Well probably not but that's what I did anyways because I was starving. It was 10 degrees outside. Fricken' cold if you ask me. I hate being cold. So here it is three in the morning and I'm headed for mexican food in the cold. It was actually a nice drive. The moon was full and lit up the snow covered field with stupid horses in them. If I were a horse I would demand an electric blanket or something. I guess that's why I wear pants.

Speaking of pants...

I have to get fitted for my tuxedo on Monday. Work is throwing a huge Christmas bash with ballroom dancing, dinner and stuff. They are going all out this year since the whole 460 million dollar buyout was a success and the investors feel that we deserve a good reason to get drunk and make asses out of ourselves. I really wish Angela could be there. Going alone is going to suck and in the last 5 months I've only seen her once. Frown. However, I'll just pretend I'm James Bond or maybe I could find some bum on the street and see if he wants free dinner and cocktails. (Only if he puts out of course, ha ha ha).

Anyways, this quesadilla sure is tastey.

Damn, I'm not even tired anymore. I guess I could go watch some old Perry Mason episodes or play some Playstation. Wait a sec, I think I'll hop on my Nintendo DS and play some wi-fi Tetris vs. some Japanese kids. They're good at it and they should be awake at this hour. (Yay for the Japanese!)

-mbh signing off...